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I just want to bring you down so badly in the worst way.
On Thursday, Jul. 20, 2006 at 3:17 p.m.

Yeah, we talk, we joke, we laugh, we make rules and generalizations, we tell stories, we share sectrets whether they're weird or intimate. We're friends, best friends, and we do everything friends should do-- but something is off.

Nothing feels on track anymore. Maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm just off. But I feel alone again. I feel helpless again, like there's no one I can count on. When I spend too much time with my best friend I feel like I need her to get by but I don't know to what extent I can count on her. There's no one who's really there who I can really trust to be there when I need them. Is that life? Is it me? Or is it just the people I'm around. I think I prefer to rely on myself. Everyone disapoints me eventually.



hold me close like we both died
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